Page 128 - Islam In Focus

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intelligence department – longs for a home, a family of her own. She needs some one
to care for and some one to care for her. She desires to belong socially and familially.
Even if we look at it from a strictly physical point of view, the implications are still
very serious, and we cannot just ignore them; otherwise, psychological complexes,
nervous breaks, social disgust and mental instability would develop as legitimate
results of leaving the problem unsolved. Clinical evidence of this is overwhelming.
These natural desires and sentimental aspirations have to be realized. These needs to
belong, and to care, and to be cared for, have to be satisfied somehow or other.
Women in such a situation do not usually transform their nature or lead an angelic
course of life. They feel that they have every right to enjoy life and obtain their share.
If they cannot have it in a legal and decent way, they never fail to find other channels,
although risky and temporary. Very few women can do without the permanent and
assured companionship of men. The overwhelming majority of unmarried women in
such a society find their way to meet men. They put up lavish parties, organize social
cocktails, attend business conventions, pursue outgoing roads, and so on. The results
of this desperate hunting is not always moral or decent. A certain married man may
appeal to some woman, and she would try to win him legally or otherwise. Also, some
woman may attract a certain man, who might be demoralized or depressed for some
reason or other. Such a man will try to have some intimate relationship with her in the
open or in secret, in a decent manner or otherwise, in a legal form or just by common
law. This would certainly have serious effects on the family life of the married man
involved, and would ruin from within the morale and social morality of society.
Wives would be deserted or neglected; children would be forsaken; homes would be
broken, and so on.
The woman who meets a male companion under such circumstances has no security
or dignity or rights of any kind. Her male companion or professional lover could be
with her, maintain her and frequent her residence with gifts and readiness to shower
on her all expressions of passionate romance. But what assurance has she got? How
can she stop him from walking out on her or letting her down in times when he is
most needed and his companionship is most desired? What will prevent him from
calling off this secret romance? Morality? Conscience? The Law? Nothing will help;
morality was given a death blow when they started this kind of intimacy; conscience
was paralyzed when he indulged in this relationship against all regulations of God and
man; the Law of society does not recognize any intimacy except with one’ s only wife.
So, the male can enjoy this easy companionship as long as he wishes, and once his
feelings cool off he can go to meet another woman and repeat the same tragedy
without regulated responsibilities or obligations on his part.
The woman who has had this experience may still be attractive and appealing, or
desirous. She may even look for another man and give it a second trial. But will this
give her any security or assurance or dignity or right? She will be running in the same
vicious circle all the time hunting or hoping to be hunted. Her burden will grow
heavier and heavier, especially if there are children involved. Yet in the end she will
be forgotten. That does not befit human dignity or feminine delicacy. Any woman in
this situation is bound to become either a nervous wreck or a rebellious revenger and
destroyer of morality